Rain on your wedding day is good luck.

"Rain on your wedding day is supposed to be good luck!"

If one more person told me that on August 14, 2015, I might have lost it.

Sarah and I looking at Pastor Gary's bulletin getting soaked by rain just seconds before deciding to move the wedding into the barn.  Photo by McKenzie Canaday.

It was 5:00 am on August 14, and I couldn't sleep.   I was giddy and excited.  I was nervous and anxious.  I was eager.  Twelve hours from that moment I would commit my life and everything I am to my best friend by saying, "I do" in front our families, friends, and most importantly, God.  I could not wait.  But as excited and anxious as I was to marry Sarah, the threat of inclement weather on our wedding day clouded my mind.

Photo by Anna Lisa Johannessen

The morning hours looked promising with a mountain blue sky and a gentle breeze.  We spent the morning carefully setting up chairs and arranging center-pieces.  By the time chairs were in place and decorations were complete, I took a sigh of relief, looked up to the sky, and thought, 'the weather might actually hold out.'

I was wrong.  By 1:30pm the hope-filled crystal-blue sky was thwarted by 'good luck.'  By the way, did you know that rain on your wedding day is good luck?

I have no doubt that every third person attempting to comfort my weather apprehensions had the best of intentions, but honestly it never seemed to help.  And whether or not it's true, I worried that rain was going to ruin our (perfect) day.  In retrospect I know it's silly to think rain could somehow dampen our moment of joy, but with 3 hours until our wedding and storm after storm rolling in, I was in panic mode.

 

At 2:00pm, while the family was busy getting ready, I stood on the porch of our wedding house (in the rain) and looked down the hill at our 'wedding venue.'  "Damn," I whispered to myself.

        

l looked at the red barn where we would have our reception.  I looked at the tables perfectly decorated. I looked at the yard games ready to be played.  I looked at the pond and the 150 perfectly aligned chairs.  I looked at the rugged cross, which Sarah's father crafted specifically for the wedding.  I looked at the spot where Sarah and I would say, "I Do."  And I looked at it all through the rain. Damn.

You fill my cup, The way you laugh.
Eyes of a child, Lean on me, you fill me up, You make me love, So unconditionally, Generous to me, you give me love And break my heart.
Slip, you fall, I pick you up and dust you off, You break my heart.
Rain, rain, rain down on me, Again and again,
Rain down on me. 

~ JTR by Dave Matthews Band (of course)

I know it's cheesy and becoming a theme, but in that moment I heard this Dave Matthews Band song in my head.  Rain. Rain down on me.  To be honest, I could only recall the chorus for the most part, but I heard it in my head. Again and again, Rain down on me.  Over and over, I heard it.  It gave me a new perspective: No amount of rain would deny the love that Sarah and I shared.  No amount of rain would prevent us from professing that love to one another.  No amount of rain would take the smile from my face or the joy from my heart.  If anything, the rain would just make it that much more memorable.  

As this new perspective was settling in, this happened:

First look! I bet you didn't even notice the rain, did you?  I know I didn't.  Photo Credit: McKenzie Canaday

Let me first say, Wow!  She looked incredible!  It blew my mind (and still does) how lucky I was am to marry Sarah, my best friend.  In that moment everything was perfect, and I couldn't care less about the rain.  In fact, the rain stopped long enough for us to take pictures with our wedding party and family.

At 4:30, the sky was (relatively) clear, and family and friends were arriving.  As they took their seats we were hopeful that we could sneak the wedding in before it rained again. 

Photo Credit: McKenzie Canaday

At 5:00, the music started playing and I was breathless.  Sarah came down the aisle.  I was elated.  The sun was shining and I was happy.  

At 5:15, Pastor Gary greeted the congregation.  He didn't get more than two sentences out until the sky opened up and it began to pour.   It rained harder than it had all day.  In our moment of dryness, the rain came.

Did you know rain on your wedding day is good luck?

Look, I don't know what rain has to do with luck on your wedding day, but if rain means:

  Being surrounded by your family and closest friends,

  Laughing, smiling, and crying all in the name of joy,

  Dancing the night away under a dream-like parachute,

  Gaining an incredible mother and father-in-law,

  Merging families,

  Sharing the happiest day of your life with the people you care most for,

  Eating wood-fired pizza from a food truck and drinking fantastic beer,

  Staring into the eyes of your closest friend and promising to share you life with them,

  And marrying your best friend who is the girl of your dreams,

well, then maybe they're right.  

So, if rain on your wedding day is good luck, I am the luckiest.

Where Did Christmas Go? And What Is Epiphany?

Where did Christmas go?  

It seems the older I get and the busier I am, the faster the season of Advent and Christmas slip by.  And despite the secular establishments committing to Christmas decorations, music, and gifts earlier and earlier in the year, the season still manages to come and go before I think I am ready.  The moments with family become more precious as the years go by, and the time spent drinking coffee by a fire or watching Christmas specials on TV while sitting in the light of a beautifully decorated Christmas tree have been taken for granted.

It is even more a shame that on Dec. 26^th the stores will pack up their displays, the radio stations will return to the popular hits, and the secular mood will shift to the next major Holiday—Valentine’s Day.  But this isn’t the case for us as Christians.  

In fact, December 25^th marks the end of the Advent season and the beginning of the Christmas season, and for the following 12 days we celebrate the birth of Christ, the Messiah, Emmanuel—God with us.  But again, the days seem to slip by faster and faster every year.

The liturgical season of Christmas will soon be over, and we will be thrusted into the season of Epiphany, which starts on January 6 (12 days after Christmas).  Epiphany is the short season nestled between Christmas and Lent, and too often it is understood as only that—the season between. 

Epiphany means “to show” or “to make known.” It is a Christian feast day that celebrates the revelation of God the Son as a human being in Jesus Christ (incarnation).  It is marked by the arrival of the Magi, who were Gentiles, coming to worship Jesus.  The birth of God’s son is revealed to the world.  God, in human form, is the light of the world, and the world will never be the same.

Epiphany 2015 - Burning of the Greens - St. Paul's Durham, NC 

On Epiphany, January 6^th, many Christians will celebrate this revelation of Jesus to the world with worship and a burning of the greens.  The burning of the greens is a symbolic service that marks the end of Christmas and the beginning of Jesus’ life and work in the world.  Often, a large fire is built and we burn representative greens.  In the blaze of the fire we are reminded of the light, which has come into the world, the light that no darkness can over come.

Epiphany, Christmas, Advent… it all seems to pass too quickly.  But no matter how fast the seasons change, both liturgically and secularly, there is one constant—God’s presence in the light of Christ.  We should be glad to remember that Epiphany means “to make known,” or “to show,” and that throughout the seasons we remember that God continues to make God’s presence know.  God continues to show God’s people God’s faithfulness and love.

We have five weeks in the Epiphany season this year.  How is God making God’s self known in your life everyday?  How do you see God’s presence among you daily?  How is God’s light shining through your actions, your neighbor’s, or even your enemies?

Originally Written by Daniel Locke for St. Paul's Durham, NC - January 2015 Cross Connections

Did You Know I Wrote A Book?

Did I ever tell you that I wrote a book?

Yes, me, the antithesis of all things literary.  Catch your breath.  

On this day, one year ago, I asked my best friend if she would consider spending the rest of her life with me.  Many of you know the story, at least the synopsis, but many of you don't.  So on this day, the one-year anniversary, I thought I'd share a little behind the scenes reflection.

Sarah has a love for books, more specifically a love for good stories.  She also loves love.  And if both literature and love can be intertwined, then we have a recipe for a happy Sarah.  I knew this about her and it was my plan all along to propose through paragraphs of well-articulated and meaningful love.

Months before I planned to propose, Sarah and I had a conversation about engagement.  She talked briefly about the necessary details for a meaningful proposal until I cut her off and said, "I know how I'd propose to you."   I won't tell you how early in our relationship the proposal conversation happened, but here's the proof:

At another point in our relationship, after Sarah recommended I read an incredibly sad book, we had this conversation:

We went on to joke about what the chapter titles for our hypothetical short story.  So, it seemed obvious to me how I should propose: write a book.  

For two months prior to the engagement I spent many (late) hours writing the chapters of our relationship.  That book led me to the most confident and anxiety-filled moment of my life.  As certain as I was that she would say 'yes,' I was equally terrified that the moment would fall flat.   

Alas, she said 'yes,' and I am so incredibly blessed that she did!  

So, to celebrate the anniversary of our engagement, I am offering the prologue to my our book, It's a Love Story.

            There are few things in life worth waking up and actually getting out of bed for.  Of course I don’t mean the unavoidable things like a full bladder, fire drill, tornado siren, gunshot, antsy dog, or nightmare.  I mean the few things in life that warm my heart more than any down, duvet, or Egyptian cotton ever could.  I mean the things that cause my heart to skip.  The things that give me reason to start a new day.  The things that give my life, my soul, even my love a purpose and meaning.  The things that render me speechless–not because I’m at a loss for words–but because in that moment there is no medium well equipped enough to help me express how I feel. 

            This is a story not only about those things but about the moments too.  It is about the moments that leave me breathless and speechless.  It is about the moments that say everything and nothing all at the same time.  It is about the moments—the good and the bad—that bring two people closer than any analogy ever can.  This is a story about the moments: the moment I met her, the moment I said hello, the moment my eyes got lost in hers, the moment our fingers interlocked for the first time, the moment she took my breath away, the moment I couldn’t shut up, the moment on the porch, in the car, with families, in the theater—in the moment.  The moment I knew. We knew.  The moments we are yet to have.

            If I had even the slightest glimpse of what these moments could feel like prior to that warm August day in 2013, I would have met her sooner.  Some way, some how, I would’ve chased her down.  They, whoever they is, always say, “When you know, you know,’ and I knew.  We knew.  And on that warm August day, in that moment I met her, that moment which gave me a reason to crawl out of bed, every possible ‘moment’ experience in my life up until that point faded away.  And I knew. We knew.  We were going to share in the moments.

            This is our story.